Transformational Leadership with Your Horse

When we built our summer home on Prince Edward Island (PEI), we also built a shed with a stall and a paddock so when we come for vacation every summer I can bring a horse with me and ride on the beach. There is something about riding on a beach that soothes my soul and the two weeks I do this every year is the highlight of my year.

Today was Kalimo’s return to PEI after his first visit last year. He knew exactly where we were going this morning for our early morning ride. Normally quiet and patient to be tacked up, this morning he was impatient. He was definitely “up” when I mounted and as we headed out for the ten-minute walk to the beach we had several conversations in which he suggested that a fast trot was in order and I suggested walk would be better. We compromised on a very fast walk. Kalimo is a powerful Andalusian stallion so when he is “up” he is a lot of horse to ride. I kept calm and grounded and just guided him to the beach, consistently letting him know that fake piaffe down the clay road was not the plan. He relaxed as soon as we reached the beach with a few mighty snorts.

At the beach, I let him explore. He sniffed the air and seaweed. He chased a retreating wave and ran backwards when it came crashing back towards him. He splashed in a tide pool and tried to dig a hole in it, soaking us both. Then it was time to ask him to cross the flowing stream which he had pointedly avoided since coming to the beach. But by crossing it we would have access to a much larger expanse of sand, perfect for a good gallop.

There is a tidal pond by the beach and since the tide was high and just going out, the stream was flowing faster than he had seen before. It is not a deep stream (only about halfway to his knees at the deepest part), about 12-15 feet across, with somewhat “squishy” sand along the edges in some places. Kalimo was not sure this was a good idea. As we approached he tried to impress me with his half pass skills to convince me that lateral work was a better idea than trying to cross that running water.

“Well buddy,” I said, “here’s the deal. We are definitely crossing this stream. I don’t care how you do it or when you do it. The end goal is the other side and you figure out how you get us there.” And that is just what he did. I kept my intent clear the whole time, focused on the other side. He approached in one area, found the sand too squishy, tried another place, didn’t like it and so on.  Within three minutes we were across the stream.  When we came back to the stream about 30 minutes later we did the same thing. It looked different because the tide had gone out further. He investigated a few places and this time decided to stride out into the ocean a bit and go around the end of it. He preened just a little bit at his cleverness.

After we returned home I was reflected on how much fun we had together. And about leadership. I recently coached a new manager about the difference between transactional and transformational leadership and my experience with Kalimo today stood out as an example of how I try to be the latter. Transactional leaders tend to be task and outcome oriented within a defined approach, and use rewards and punishments to promote performance that meets expectations. Transformational leaders create the vision, focus on the strengths of those they lead, and create situations that enable people to find their own path to the outcome, leaving people feeling more empowered and with stronger capacities as a result.

Today I created the vision for Kalimo (crossing the stream), encouraged him to figure out the way across without any expectation of where or how we would get there – only that we would get there. And we did, even though he did not choose to cross where I thought might have been the best place. Whether we are helping our horses learn to cross a stream, learn a shoulder in, or execute a correct flying change, we are leading them through this process and have a choice about whether we are a transactional leader or a transformational one.  I believe the latter is not always the easiest but is ultimately the path to the greatest success.

Take Home Message for Riding Instructors

Are you a transactional leader with your riding students or a transformational leader? A riding instructor who is a transactional leader will teach a “command” lesson with most of the lesson being a series of instructions (turn left, now shoulderb-in, change the rein, lower your hands, etc). The transactional riding instructor tends to talk a lot during a lesson. The transformational leader will also use commands, but there will be periods of silence as she allows the rider to feel what is happening or she may work the horse in- hand with the rider mounted so the rider can experience a particular movement and then go try it on her own. If we use a transformational leadership style while coaching as much as possible, we will have a better chance of creating curious riders who are able to work through riding questions and problems.

When Dedicated Rider Meets Peri-Menopause 

I am not aging gracefully.  The symptoms of peri-menopause started creeping up on me slowly with an occasional hot flash and irregular periods.  Then, all of a sudden, “WHAM!” my body started some radical changes that were definitely not for the better. 

The worst was the crushing fatigue. I am used to having lots of energy and being involved in many activities throughout each day. I work full time, own a couple of businesses, care for my two horses and a boarder at home, ride my two horses 4 or 5 times a week, teach a few riding lessons, work out regularly, look after a large country property and still find time to do a little sewing, singing and dancing the tango with my husband.  Suddenly, last fall, I just couldn’t do it all anymore.  I would come home from work at  6 pm, do the stable chores and feed the horses, eat supper and by 7:30 pm I was so tired I could not even think about lifting a saddle on a horse much less ride two of them.  Even when my chronic insomnia was not making me tired, being exhausted seemed to have become the new normal.

Then there was the weight gain.  Even when I strictly regulated what I ate, and intensely worked out regularly in addition to riding most days, I gained weight.  This was frustrating to the point that I gave up on eating well and working out for while – it seemed pointless to bother.  Workouts that used to help me keep feeling fit and vigorous just added to my exhaustion.  

And it would be rather ironic to forget to mention the forgetfulness. I am a detail person. I do NOT forget to do things. Or at least I didn’t. Now I regularly lose my keys in the house, forget why I walked into a room and have to check several times to make sure I have actually remembered to lock doors when I leave the house.

All of this is not unique to riders.  Most women go through some sort of their own special torture in the transition to menopause.  However, it does have implications for those of us who ride.  Here are some of the things aging women riders deal with:

• ·        Guilt over not riding on the schedule that you used to follow.  My horses are used to workouts 4 or 5 times a week but now, sometimes I am lucky if I can manage to find the energy to exercise them twice a week.  And I feel guilty about not being consistent because I know how important consistency is in training.
•       Our bodies physically change shape and size in peri-menopause, and sometimes this is not within our control.  In addition to the body image issues this causes, it also in some women can change their balance in the saddle and make them feel like suddenly they cannot ride correctly anymore.  
•      We cannot underestimate the impact of body image issues either.  I know a woman rider going though peri-menopause who will not ride if anyone else is present because she feels so ugly in her riding breeches after a period of rapid weight gain.
• ·        For some women, mental focus becomes challenging.  I have had mature women riders in the middle of lesson that’s going really well suddenly stop and look at me in horror and say “I have no idea what I was just doing or what to do next.”
• ·         Some women have heightened emotions during this phase of their lives.  Even the slightest of things can make the waterworks start.  I have taught lessons with women in this phase of their lives who have ridden something like a lovely shoulder in and then dissolve into tears because it was so beautiful.  And then be horribly embarrassed that they are crying.

Peri-meonpausal riders need to learn to be kind to themselves and they need understanding from others as they journey through this phase of their lives. The most wonderful benefit we peri-menopausal riders have is our horses, who accept us unconditionally even when we have trouble accepting ourselves. 

Take away for instructors

For male riding instructors or younger women riding instructors who have not yet experienced the trials of peri-menopause, it is really important to understand the magnitude of the physical and mental changes and challenges women experience at this time.  Being aware of it and talking about it can help the rider not feel isolated or like they are “losing their mind.”  Encourage them to discuss their experiences with other female riders who have passed through this phase in their lives.  They can often provide reassurance that only can be provided by someone with a shared experience.  If a peri-menopausal woman suddenly feels like she just can’t seem to ride correctly anymore, help her find her centre of gravity again and go back to working on the basics of proper position.  It is always OK to teach a lesson on the basics with even the most advanced rider. And if she unexpectedly breaks into tears, reassure her that tears are just one form of release and are very normal. Encourage her to stop, take a few deep breaths, rub her horse’s neck a few times and giver her time to compose herself, and then carry on when she is ready.

Would You Want to Be Your Horse?

Now here is an interesting question to contemplate the next time you ride.  Would you like to be your horse right now if that meant carrying you on your back?  I heard a clinician recently ask this question and I thought it was brilliant. She was speaking to someone who was very stuck in her hip joints and was not following the movement of the horse.  She was also stuck in the shoulders so her hands were not softly following the horse’s head movement, and every time his head moved as he walked his mouth banged against the immobile bit.

The question was not asked in a negative insulting way, but rather in a supportive way that really encouraged the rider to think about how her horse was feeling in response to what she was or was not doing.  The rider thought briefly about the question and shortly afterward answered “no”.  The clinician asked her to describe why and she quickly identified her stuck seat and stuck hands.  It didn’t take long for her to refocus her awareness to these issues and correct them.

I spoke to the rider after her lesson and she was amazed.  She said that she has been told many times by instructors to “soften her hands” and “loosen her seat” and she tries to do as they request believing she has accomplished it.  Only to be told the exact same thing the next lesson.  For some reason, she observed, despite her best intentions she just couldn’t seem to make the positive changes she made stick beyond a lesson.  Being asked to consider whether or not she would like to be her horse was like someone switched on a lightbulb for her.  She was even more amazed the next day when she approached her riding from this perspective and was able to keep her seat less tight and her hands softer.

What if everyone applied this question to their riding all of the time?  And then made an effort to change whatever it is that would make it undesirable to be your horse, whether it be riding position, tack or something else.  I think we would find more people with better awareness of their own balance (would you like to carry around a knapsack weighing one tenth of your weight that is lopsided?).  I think we would see closer attention paid to saddle fit, girth over-tightening and bit fitting. For example, have you ever held a bit in one hand that has leather reins attached to the bit ring and a bit in the other hand that has reins clipped to the bit ring by a metal clip?  Try it, and get someone to jiggle the reins.  The difference is remarkable.  The harshness of the metal clip on the metal bit ring travels through the bit and is horrible compared to the leather on the bit ring.  Many people use these types of reins for convenience, but if they thought about which reins their horse would choose if he could, their choice would likely be different.

So, periodically as you ride ask yourself “Would I want to be my horse right now?”  If the answer is no, make a change that would enable you to answer yes.

Take home message for equestrian educators

As equestrian educators we have as much responsibility for the welfare of the horses that help us teach our students as we do for the students.  Therefore, we should take every opportunity to foster empathy for horses in our students.  I asked a similar question to the one above to a student of mine once.  We had been working on a lesson program over several months to help her horse move less on the forehand.  He was coming back to riding after being laid off due to a lameness issue that was exacerbated by being ridden on the forehand.  He was gradually beginning to develop a stronger back and hind end muscles through lots of slow-paced careful work in hand and under saddle.  One day I came out to the arena and to my surprise, I saw my student riding her horse at a very fast trot with a hollow back.  The student was smiling and the horse looked miserable.  He was clearly uncomfortable.  Although it was not a lesson night I stopped her and asked her what she was doing. 

She replied that she just really felt like going fast tonight for the first time in a long while because she finds it more fun to go fast.  I asked her “how do you think your horse feels about that?”  She was quiet for a moment and then she identified that this was probably not the best thing for him right now. I agreed and left them to the rest of their ride, which she refocused on work that was both more comfortable and more beneficial for her horse.  Later, she found me in the stable and thanked me for stopping her.  She identified that she had not been thinking of her horse first and that was wrong.

There was no question in my mind that I had to try and intervene in that circumstance for the benefit of the horse.  Doing it in a way that asked the student to think about how her horse was feeling proved to be a useful way to refocus her thinking and an opportunity to try and improve her empathy.

Shared Energy

If you have ever watched horses in the pasture together you have an understanding of what shared energy is all about. Without signs that are obvious to the human eye the horses clearly communicate with each other when it's time to move to better grass or when there might be a predator lurking in the field. Most riders have also experienced shared energy with their horse. It is in those moments where it seems like you only need to think what the next movement will be and suddenly you and your horse are doing it. The best riders in the world, the ones who ride effortlessly with their horses and seemingly use very few aids are accomplished at establishing and using shared energy.

It is my experience that shared energy also happens during riding lessons. There is a three way sharing of energy: between horse, rider and instructor. Good riding instructors make an assessment of the state of shared energy between horse and rider early in the riding lesson. Sometimes there are very clear disconnections in the sharing of energy.  An example is when a rider does not take time to calm their mind and body after a stressful day at work.  The rider will often not be able to move harmoniously with the horse and the horse will move less fluidly than normal. Their shared energy is blocked by the riders’ stress and tension.

There is also a shared energy between the student and the instructor. Astute instructors who are tuned into the energy of their students can often tell even before the student mounts their horse what the student’s emotional state is. There are cues through what they say, how they move and how they interact with their horse that can tell an instructor whether or not the rider’s energy is mainly positive or negative.. I have had situations where a rider has come into my stable and before they even talk to me or visit their horse I can tell that there's something wrong simply by the feeling of energy that they bring with them into the barn.

I have done numerous experiments with shared energy in riding lessons. I have had situations where I'm working with a very nervous rider who may have had an escalation in anxiety due to some event such as a spook from the horse. I have consciously centered and grounded myself, slowed my breathing and thought about projecting calm towards horse and rider. In all of the occasions that I have tried this, the riders have without exception indicated that something changed for them and it became easier to breathe, release tension and refocus on the ride.  

I have also observed on many occasions how much the instructor’s energy can impact the horse. There is the long-standing joke that the instructor who stands in the center of the arena is often a horse magnet, especially for school horses that have learned coming to the center means a chance to stop while the instructor talks to the rider. I do not tend to teach lessons in riding schools with school horses, but rather in private barns with privately owned horses. I also do not stand in the center of the ring - I move around a lot so the traditional experience of the instructor magnet doesn't really hold true for me. I have experienced on numerous occasions lessons where riders are perhaps having difficulty learning a new skill or communicating with their horses. The riders and I have noticed that their horse keeps gravitating to me throughout the lesson no matter where I happen to be standing.  I believe the horses are seeking quiet supportive energy as a break from the negative energy their rider is projecting at the time. I have watched this phenomenon with other coaches whose work I admire as well.

So when you walk into the riding arena with your horse ready for your lesson, keep in mind that your energy impacts your horse and it impacts your instructor. It is important to be aware of what energy you're bringing into the arena. Is your energy positive or negative?  Is it at a low or high level? I encourage you to experiment with understanding shared energy. Please share your thoughts and your comments about shared energy – it is a subject that fascinates me and I feel like I have barely scratched the surface of understanding.

Take away message for equestrian educators

As an equestrian educator you have a dual responsibility when it comes to managing the energy in the learning environment of a horse and rider. The first responsibility is understanding the current state of shared energy between horse and rider. Do they seem to be working well together? If not, and you can't find the cause in the rider’s physical body position, it could be that there's a disconnect in the way that horse and rider are sharing energy. I have found if I can identify there's an issue in the way that horse and rider are sharing energy, I can bring it to the rider's attention we can almost always correct it often the issue is one of lack of awareness on the riders purse of the fact that there is a disconnect.

The second responsibility as a riding instructor is monitoring your own energy that you bring to the lesson. In the same way that you as a riding instructor can read the energy of horse and rider, so too will your energy affect the rider and horse and the way they are able to perform in a lesson. It is our responsibility as educators to make sure that we bring a positive energy that supports learning to a lesson. I have a habit of stopping at the doorway to the riding arena and before I enter, taking a moment to ground and center myself in order to respect the fact that I may have just come from a bustling busy environment but now my attention and my energy need to be focused on the learning experience of the two learners in the arena. I would love to hear more about other riding instructors’ experience of shared energy.

Learning and the Introvert

My idea of a perfect day off to relax is a day at the beach by myself with a good book that I may or may not choose to read (after spending time with the horses of course). Quiet time spent enjoying the sights, sounds and scents of natural beauty around me is good for my soul.  I have a number of friends who also like to relax at the beach, but they want to go with friends, play lots of beach games like volleyball and have a grand time socializing.  I am sure that they too enjoy being at the beach, but they need social contact to relax while I need quiet.  The difference between us? They are extroverts and I am an introvert.

I have recently read the book “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking” by Susan Cain.  A very interesting read indeed, and it got me thinking about the differences in how introverted and extroverted riders learn.  Introverts prefer less stimulation than extroverts (hence the desire to be on the beach by myself), whereas extroverts enjoy more stimulation, like meeting new people.  Extroverts are often the life of the dinner party, prefer talking to listening and rarely find themselves at a loss for words.  Introverts may have very strong social skills and enjoy socializing but they will often want to leave the party early to go home and relax alone or with close family.  In working and learning environments, extroverts enjoy working in groups whereas the introvert prefers working and learns better alone.

This has significant implications for the way we learn and teach about riding.  I have one riding student who absolutely cannot focus on the lesson until she provides me with lots of details about her life on and off horseback since the last time we met.  For the first ten minutes of her lesson, she talks, and I listen while she walks her horse on a loose rein to warm him up.  I have come to understand that this is necessary for her, for her own warm up.  As a strong extrovert, she needs to develop that sense of connection with the other person in the arena before she can get on with the lesson.  I am practiced now and I can tell when we have reached the point where she is ready to focus.  When we reach that point I usually proceed with “Now that we are warmed up, let’s begin, and that marks the beginning of our real work, even though. I am sure she would tell observers that her lesson actually began 10 minutes before.  Initially I thought this person was suffering from a serious lack of focus.  Then I realized that she is an extrovert and I need to respect her need to connect before proceeding.

In great contrast to this, my lessons with my own coach are often filled more with silence than spoken words. After we establish what we want to work on, she will give some verbal instruction or feedback and then she waits quietly while I experiment with how to implement what she has just told me.  I work with my horse and she tells me when it is right or offers a correction when needed, but she respects my introverted learning style that is based on quiet focus.

Are you an introvert or an extrovert?  How does it impact how you learn as a rider?  If you are an introvert taking group lessons all of the time, you might want to think about semi-private or private lessons.  If you are an extrovert who mostly works alone, you might want to make sure you find time to socialize with like-minded equestrians to satisfy your need for connection with others as part of your equestrian experience.

Take home message for equestrian educators:

It is important to know if your students are introverts or extroverts and adjust your teaching style accordingly.  For example, often in group lessons, I have watched riding instructors have all the group members line up in the centre and then ask each rider to demonstrate a skill one at a time.  This can be incredibly stressful for the introvert who may not learn well with other people watching, whereas the extrovert will be energized by the presence of others. People cannot change if they are introverted or extroverted.  It is hard-wired into our personality.  Therefore, it is up to riding instructors to adjust their teaching style to maximize the learning opportunities for both extroverted and introverted students.

Why Do You Ride?

Whenever I ask this question of an equestrian, I usually get a brief “because I love horses,” “because I love working in partnership with such a powerful animal,” “because I love those moments when we feel like we are moving as one,” or similar answers.  While these are fine reasons to ride, I think that for many of us, there is a much deeper reason. A reason that speaks to a deeper internal reward.  And if we understand that deeper reason, it is a resource we can turn to in times when we are frustrated in our riding journey.

As part of my own reflective practice I have come to understand that for me, being with horses and in particular riding one of my own horses, is a key to finding my inner peace and understanding of my connection to the world around me.  To find those beautiful moments of togetherness with my horses, I must learn to clear my mind of all the noise of work and life stresses, ignore the distractions of the hundreds of tasks that need doing, and devote my entire awareness to the relationship with another being in the universe – the horse that I am with.  Being with my horses helps me find joy in the present moment and after spending time with my horses I feel refreshed, renewed and rebalanced.

Sure I have riding goals and I always want to advance my ability as a rider.  I enjoy the challenge of riding.  And just like everyone else, I have times when I feel frustrated that my horse and I cannot seem get past a particular sticky spot in our training.  When I reach that place of frustration, if I pause for a few days and reflect on the question “why do I ride?” I come to the same understanding every time: I ride because riding is a pathway to inner peace for me.  Then the fact that we have not been able to accomplish a particular goal becomes much less important.  Answering this question inevitably allows me to free myself from the bondage of goal-driven frustration and negative self-talk and enables me to return to listening to my horse and finding other pathways that ultimately always lead me to accomplish the goal I set out to achieve in the first place.

Why do YOU ride?

Take home message for equestrian educators

Help your students understand their reason for riding.  I have stopped many students in the middle of a lesson when it is apparent that they are becoming overwhelmed with frustration and I have asked them this question.  They always give me a quick answer like those I listed above. I try to help them reflect a little deeper with responses like “you can enjoy working in partnership with a horse without riding” or “you can love horses without riding them” or ”you can have beautiful moments moving as one with a horse by doing work in hand.”  I suggest to them that they can do all of these things without riding.  I encourage them to dig a little deeper - so why do you RIDE? 

What fabulous discussions I have had with students when we explore this together and they increase their own awareness of why they do what they do.  Frustration evaporates, the horse relaxes and the lesson proceeds in a whole other way.  Once I have had this discussion with a student, in future lessons when I see frustration growing, all I have to do is ask them to take a walk break and reflect on why they ride.  It works every time.

Who IS That Talking in My Head?

“What is the matter with you?  Just do as you were taught by the instructor! ”

“Why can’t you just seem to do this one little thing correctly?”

“You are such an idiot.  Can’t you figure this out?”

“Don’t be such a dummy. Everyone ELSE can do this. Why can’t you?”

Sound familiar? Almost every rider has heard these questions, or similar versions.  And we (hopefully) don’t hear them from anyone other than ourselves.  We pick at ourselves endlessly with negative self-talk and expect unrealistic and unattainable perfection.  Why do we do this?  And more importantly, how do we stop doing it?

The Ohio Center for Sports Psychology lists 9 mental skills for successful athletes.  One of them is positive self-talk.  They suggest that successful athletes train the voice in their head to talk to them just like they would talk to their own best friend.  When you use positive self-talk, you reframe the conversation you have in your head from negative to encouraging. You highlight the positive, identify what’s not working and figure out a positive plan forward.  Just like your best friend who offers encouragement and suggestions.

When our ego gets involved in our riding, we get focused on the end product as the reward, rather than the process or journey as the reward.  The only thing that satisfies the ego is the end reward.  I want to ride a shoulder –in.  Therefore the reward and only acceptable outcome to the ego is executing a perfect shoulder-in.  And if I don’t achieve it, the ego starts nattering away at us telling us what a bad job we are doing.  The ego is that persistent voice in your head that constantly makes us worry whether we or what we do is good enough by our own or someone else’s standards.

Negative self-talk produces frustration and negative energy, both of which are counter-productive to effective riding.  But we can train the ego to be our friend instead of our foe by learning how to stop negative self-talk and use positive self-talk.  There are lots of self-help books and articles on the internet that offer ideas for how to use positive self-talk.  For the students that I have worked with on this issue, the first most important thing they must do is recognize when their ego is getting in the way with negative self-talk.  Negative self-talk becomes a habit that we fall into and don’t even realize the impact it has upon us or our horse.  Once we recognize “that is negative self-talk!” we can then use something called a pattern interrupt to stop it and help us reframe our self-talk to be positive.

To create a pattern interrupt, you need to pick an image that is not at all related to riding.  I had one student pick an image of a refrigerator.  Every time she caught herself using negative self-talk she would think of the image of a refrigerator to stop the pattern of negative thought.  Once you stop negative thinking you can shape your thoughts in a different way that help you move forward more positively and productively. Give yourself advice. “Well that exercise didn’t go so well.  Let’s experiment to see what I can change to see if we can make it better next time.”  This approach changes the energy to be more positive, where past mistakes become opportunities for learning and further inquiry.  Your horse will thank you for your reduced frustration level, which will help reduce the tension he feels in your body.

Example of Reframing Negative Self Talk

Heave sigh.  I have been working on learning the shoulder-in for weeks and weeks now and I am still not getting it.  I am so BAD at this.  I cannot even mange to get my horse to understand what I want.  And then when we finally get close to performing a shoulder in, I go and ruin it every time by pulling on the inside rein.

“Wait a minute, what am I doing? REFRIGERATOR!

More Positive Approach

Hmm.  We had really great rhythm going in that trot.  But when we tried the shoulder in again we lost the rhythm again.  I wonder happened to disrupt the rhythm? Let’s try that again and see if I can keep my body moving freely with my horse as we prepare for shoulder-in.  Let’s try and see what happens. It is an experiment and if it doesn’t work we will try something else.”

*Reference: https://www.sportpsych.org/nine-mental-skills-overview

Finding the Off Switch – Turning Off the Overthink

I am reading an interesting book that a friend gave to me called “The Art of Thinking Clearly” by Rolf Dobelli.  It is a great collection of short chapters about the simple errors we make in our day to day thinking that impact our choices and our happiness in big ways.  Several of his observations have a direct connection to riding. The one that most immediately stood out for me was the chapter on overthinking. Most of us riders are guilty of this at some point; some riders are challenged by this every time they ride.

Dobelli says “Essentially if you think too much, you cut off your mind from the wisdom of your feelings.”  Think about that for a minute.  Achieving a harmonious horse-rider relationship is primarily about a human learning to feel the horse underneath them.  Learning to feel the movement of the horse, the balance of the horse, the tension of the horse, and the flow of energy between the horse and rider.  How then can we achieve this if the mind is busy thinking about a checklist of technical things related to riding?  The answer: we can’t.

This then raises the question when do you use your thinking mind and when do you focus on feel?  Because let’s face it. Most riders need some level of technical detail that requires them to think about how to use their body and how to communicate with the horse.  Most of us are not born with that innate ability.  We don’t just put beginners on a horse and say there you are – go feel the horse and you will figure it out.  That’s not fair to the horse or the rider.  So there is a place in riding for the thinking part of our mind that asks us questions like “is my contact through the reins steady enough? Are my reins too long? Are my legs in the right place?” And so on.  It becomes a problem when this mental chatter is constant throughout the entire ride.

So how do we turn off the mental chatter?  One approach is to tune into and experience your senses.  What are your ears telling you?  What is your sense of touch telling you? How is the horse’s body moving underneath you? What’s happening all around you right now (not five minutes ago or possibly in the next five minutes – but right now)?  Another approach is to smile and laugh during your ride.  The benefit of smiling and laughter to our health and well-being are enormous, including the ability to stop overthinking. Knowing how to and practicing effectively turning off “the overthink” is essential to enabling us to maximize the potential of our relationship with our horses.

Take Home Message for Equestrian Educators

Riding instructors have two main responsibilities in helping their riders stop overthinking. The first is recognizing it when it happens during lessons, so we can alert the student to the fact they are overthinking and invite them to try a different approach.  Some of the signs of overthinking are increased tension in horse and rider, hardening of the rider’s jaw, shallow breathing, increasing frustration, or the tendency to ride around and around the outside of the schooling arena without any schooling figures.

The second responsibility riding instructors have is to not teach in a manner that promotes overthinking.  A lesson in which an instructor constantly issues commands to the rider does not allow the rider any time to feel.  Such a lesson is all about doing, and we need to think in order to do.  An endless sequence of commands like “move your leg back, drop your hands, more leg, half halt” and so on does not give the student time to feel.  Offer technical instructions, but also allow ample quiet time so horse and rider can experience the feeling of new movements.  We must build in times throughout the lesson that are dedicated to feeling not thinking.